She walked up to me with a determined look and a gait that looked somewhat like a Navy Seal full-on assault. I would’ve been worried, except she was shaped like an upside-down capital L. Osteoporosis, more than likely.
“Young man, I can’t believe you would post about needing to use the restroom!”
“Oh.”
“That is so offensive!”
“Really?”
“Don’t you have any pride? Don’t you have any dignity?”
“Some.”
“What do you have to say for yourself, young man?”
“I’ll…”
“I think you need to be taken out behind the woodshed.”
“…write…”
“It was a flagrant foul upon the minds of your readers. It was an assault upon the innocence of the pure in heart.”
“…about…”
“The audacity of young people these days.”
“…anything.”
“Aren’t you ashamed?”
“Well, I…”
“Aren’t you embarrassed? Don’t you think that you should make a public apology?”
“No and…”
“Why, for heaven’s sake, would you ever mention such a dastardly and disgusting occasion in your life?”
“I was…”
“Well, here’s my two cents worth,” she opens up a Thesaurus, “You should be mortified, horrified, discomfited, abashed, remorseful, conscious-stricken, non-plussed, disconcerted, red-faced, appalled, and chagrined.”
“Two cents, huh?”
“To think that people can simply mention anything you want to in public, without any thought to anyone else or having someone else’s best interest in mind.”
“Just be glad I didn’t use you as the example in the story.”
And it was at that point that she exploded into a cacophony of words that are best not mentioned in a public forum.
Young people these days.
to those with no sense of humor,
– Caleb
caneymountainblog.com 